Decisions From Possibility

grettascholtenMay 16, 2020

How to make decisions for the future you want

Why is it so hard to make decisions for ourselves that we’ve never made before? ⁣These are decisions that I would classify as "new decisions."

These can be anything from deciding to start exercising when you’ve never lifted weights in your adult life, deciding to use a calendar when you’ve never planned out a day in your life, or even deciding to follow a budget even though you don’t have a clue where to start. Or, investing in that course or that coach.  All of these decisions feel really daunting and our immediate reaction is to say 'no.' Why?

We make decisions and we decide what’s right and what’s wrong. What’s “right” or “wrong” is based off of our belief systems from the past. Our brain looks to our past results to see what’s possible for us in the future. If it's something we've never done our brain clams up and says no. way. Not possible. Never done it before.  Not interested! But why?

⁣Our brain doesn’t like to create new thinking because new thinking, according to our lower brain, is hard and dangerous. Our lower brain really likes to be efficient. Thinking the same thoughts = efficient. A great example of this is: think back to a time you started a new job or took a class in school that was really challenging. You were probably very focused, grasping to make sense of things and at the end of the day - very tired.⁣ That’s because it requires new thinking.

When you go to make a new decision - ESPECIALLY one that you’ve never made before AND it involves money, time, effort and adopting a new identity, your lower brain is like lol no. This is definitely not a good decision. But the other part of your brain - the higher level, conscious brain that is thinking in possibility is saying YES. ⁣

⁣Here’s where the pain comes in. In order to get new results you have to think new thoughts and make decisions from possibility, not from your past. Meaning you literally have to override your lower brain’s very well-worn way of thinking with your conscious brain to get to the new decision. ⁣Your lower brain will be telling you NO WAY. The whole time while you're considering your new decision AND in the aftermath if you take the leap and say yes to the "new decision."

However, if you say no, you'll feel relief. And that's where things get tricky. It feels good in the moment but what you're saying 'no' to possibility, to growth. Saying 'yes' to new decisions feels harder but it's so worth it.  I firmly believe we are here to evolve and grow and become more of who we are. Notice I didn't say better. We're already 100% worthy - growth or stagnation doesn't change that fact, but that's for another post.

⁣Making new decisions for ourselves is disorienting and scary, but it's unbelievably exciting, too. If you want to learn to get from where you are to where you want to be, schedule a consultation! It's totally free, fun and great practice at making new decisions for yourself!

4 Causes of Procrastination, & How To Solve for Them So You Can Get Shit Done

By grettascholten | Apr 14, 2021 | 0 Comments

Do you want to stop procrastinating and get shit done? Good. You’re in the right place. Did you know there are (at a minimum) 28 main reasons why people procrastinate? Fear of failure, negative feedback, or making a mistake Task aversion due to perceiving a task as boring, frustrating, tedious, or too challenging Overwhelm Prioritization of short-term mood (picking the fun thing over the planned thing)   The best news is you personally probably only use 3-4 main patterns of procrastination AND they’re all solvable at the thought level. Meaning, once you’re aware of the pattern, and what it’s creating for you, you can learn how to think on purpose about those tasks to create the result you want: doing the thing right away instead of procrastinating. Join me on a mini-session to learn what you can do today to stop procrastination, and start getting shit done.

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The Two Most Common Thoughts that Create Overwhelm & What To Do About Them

By grettascholten | Apr 13, 2021 | 0 Comments

This is often caused by an underlying thought, “I don’t know the right place to start” or “I have to pick the right thing to start on.” We falsely think there’s a right or wrong thing to do in any given moment. We end up putting pressure on our decision which paralyzes our decision-making and our action towards getting something, anything done. Once you have the details (see solution below), make the best decision with the information you have in the moment.   Get clear on the details by writing down everything that needs to get done today, decide on ONE place to get started, highlight that one item, and take a Sharpie to the rest (only do this Sharpie part in your brain). I love the visual of having everything that you’d like to do written out on a piece of paper, with the first item highlighted, and the rest blacked out in Sharpie. P.S. This is a magic Sharpie and after you’re done with the first thing that you highlighted, the next item gets un-Sharpied and highlighted so you always know what you’re focusing on in the moment.   You’re arguing with reality. Even if there were an actual deadline that you missed, you’re still arguing with reality. You shouldn’t have been done with it because you’re not actually done with it. Our brains falsely think that if we should ourselves, we’ll somehow get it done faster. The only reason our brains want to get it done faster is because we think turning it in will make us feel better. This is because when you aren’t aware that your thinking is causing your feelings, you think your external circumstances are the cause your feelings. Therefore, we want to change and control those external circumstances to try to feel better. The only reason you actually feel better when you turn it in is because the unconscious drip of ‘should’ing’ yourself gets turned off. Should’ing yourself always feels terrible. 99/100, should’ing yourself produces a negative emotion, whether that’s overwhelm or feeling defeated or another negative emotion. And if you’ve read this post, you know that our actions are driven by our feelings.   If you want to get that thing done now, or even today, you’re going to want to take more focused, decisive action from a place of commitment or determination rather than overwhelm because overwhelm generally creates inaction, rather than action.   Join me on your complimentary consult to learn what you can do today to remove overwhelm, stress and anxiety from your life and achieve peace of mind and freedom to get exactly what you want. ⠀ Click here to sign up and discover how to overcome overwhelm.

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Waiting for Your Life to Calm Down

By grettascholten | Apr 12, 2021 | 0 Comments

Waiting for your life to calm down before you start to work on your time management is like waiting to feel better before taking medicine. Once you learn how to manage your time then your life will calm down. That’s because you’ll know how to quickly plan your time in a way that makes it easy to follow through and in a way that gets easier every week. So much so you slide into a routine without even realizing it. And you aren’t going to miss or be caught off guard by appointments, or meetings, or events because the way you’ll plan captures all of the loose ends.      

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How to Create Focused Energy Instead of Overwhelm

By grettascholten | Apr 12, 2021 | 1 Comment

Let’s start by talking about where overwhelm comes from. If you’re like most people, you think it comes from too much to do and too little time. Overwhelm is actually an emotion that is created by the way you’re thinking. And here’s how we know: Have you ever been in the same job as someone else and they’re calm, cool and collected and meanwhile you’re a ball of stress and overwhelm? That’s because they are thinking different thoughts about the same job. It’s easy to attribute their calm demeanor to personality but what is personality, anyway? Personality is defined as, “individual differences in characteristic patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving.” Usually these patterns are unconscious, but they don’t have to be. We can make them conscious by becoming the observer of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. And once these patterns are in your awareness, you can change them on purpose by choosing to think and believe different thoughts. This works because our thoughts create our feelings and our feelings drive our behaviors – what we do and don’t do. This is why trying to change your habits first, like creating to-do lists or waking up an hour earlier so you have more time to get things done, only stick temporarily and why they don’t solve for your overwhelm longterm. When you still have that unconscious programming operating in the background, you’re going to keep coming back to it. Until you’re aware of it, you can’t change it. It’s like when you leave a door open in the winter and your house gets cooler. The heat kicks on to bring it back to the set temperature. Your unconscious beliefs are your set temperature and they’ll keep bringing you back to what’s normal for you until you’re aware of them. If you want to uncover what your set temperature is and how to change it from overwhelm to calm, schedule your consult. On your call, I’ll ask you questions that uncover your unconscious programing that’s creating overwhelm, so you can be aware of it, and start to change it right away.    

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Customized Time Management Strategies

By grettascholten | Apr 11, 2021 | 0 Comments

One Size Doesn’t Fit All  That’s why together, we’ll create your customized time strategy, using only what works best for you. With this tailored plan, you’ll be able to manage your time well and create a calm, organized life without the guilt. Simple, doable plan Impact plan Use Your Phone Less Lasting Habit Creation Simple Routine Creation and Implementation It’s Done – Calendaring Cyclical Time Management Future-Self Review Weekly Evaluation Instagram: Intentionally Radical Honesty: Planning Filter Flexible Scheduling

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Ingrained Beliefs

By grettascholten | Apr 11, 2021 | 0 Comments

Women have different barriers and challenges to managing their time well than men do. This doesn’t mean it’s impossible for us to manage our time well or easily – far from it. It just means as a women, you need a different approach than the advice you read out in the world because general time management advice was designed with men in mind. We put a lot of stock in what other’s think of us, of what we should do, of what is acceptable and what’s not. This leads us to looking outside of ourselves to decide what to do, how to act, which decisions to make We place other’s happiness above our own – whether that’s our kids or our spouse or our boss or our co-workers. It’s rampant We do things out of obligation rather than risk disappointing someone else. This is a variation of the above point. We would much rather feel frustrated or obligated or like a martyr than risk letting someone else down We seek validation and answers and approval outside of ourselves because we don’t know how to give it to ourselves, we don’t know how to deeply trust ourselves, and we think other’s might know better than we do

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Time Management: Math & Drama

By grettascholten | Apr 11, 2021 | 0 Comments

Time is purely perceptual construct. Or said another way, your perception creates your experience of time. There are the seconds, minutes, and hours in a day (the math) and then there’s your thoughts about them (the drama). Until you control the drama, you won’t control the math. If you’re ready to control both – book a consult. On your call, you’ll get to see exactly where your drama is and how it’s creating the experience of your life – and, how to change it.

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When Planning Goes Wrong

By grettascholten | Mar 25, 2021 | 0 Comments

You’re full of energy and determination to get everything done today. So, naturally, you sit down to write out your plan first. Eee! This is going to be SUCH a productive day. Gonna kill it. Your excitement builds higher with each task you write, imagining how good it’s going to feel when everything is done. The clean house. The meals prepped. The workout complete. And then. You notice your energy starts to dip. It’s subtle at first so you wave it away and keep writing. Oh no. It’s getting stronger. Impossible to ignore at this point. And then ALL of the questions start flooding in. How am I going to do this project? What workout am I going to do? When am I going to get all of this done? Overwhelm sets in. Then the doubt. You stop writing. Defeat takes over and feel even worse than before you started. And worse yet, you have no energy to do anything at all now and suddenly everything seems pressing – like it should have been done yesterday. A nap sounds good. What the hell just happened? Planning Overwhelm. I’ll teach you exactly what to do when you’re in it and how to avoid it altogether.

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Chill. Out. & Hit Your Goals

By grettascholten | Mar 23, 2021 | 0 Comments

You can do things “imperfectly” and still create your goals. Not in spite of your imperfections but because of them. Learning how to lean into the way you work best. When you learn how to lighten up and allow, expect, and tailor your goals around your “imperfections”, you’ll hit your goal faster. If you’re trying to force your goal and do things perfectly or how you think “should”, you’re actually slowing yourself down. Release the tight grasp you have on how you think you’re supposed to be hitting your goals and start experimenting with what would be fun, instead. The more fun you have, the faster you hit your goals.

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Power of Planning

By grettascholten | Mar 22, 2021 | 0 Comments

If you repeated the way you spent your time today for the next 365 days, where would you be a year from now? Would you be happy with where you’d be? Great! Make a note of what are you doing, how you’re feeling and what are you thinking. Repeat those things daily. Now, if you’re like most people, you probably don’t like where you’d be if you spent the next 365 days the way you spent your time today. Thankfully, this is easily solvable. First, we’ll get clear on where you want to go by determining the goal you want to create. Then, we’ll reverse engineer your goal to create your two-part plan: Simple, doable plan Impact plan The simple, doable plans builds your consistency, confidence and self-image, and your impact plan allows you to hit your goals faster and easier. It acts as rocket fuel for your goal. Those plans go into your calendar and you learn exactly how to follow your calendar like a boss.    

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