I have to do it right

GrettaApril 7, 2022

Procrastination and inadvertent inauthenticity go hand in hand. Which is why the fastest way out of procrastination is to be authentically yourself.

Let me explain.

When you tell yourself, “I have to get this right” or “I just need to do this the right way,” what you're really saying is: I need to do it like someone else.

This is why you research and ask around and compare.

What you're really looking for in those moments of doubt is safety and certainty. (To our brains, familiar = safe and certain)

Now, to be fair: Copying is a part of the learning process:

Interest
Copy
Reinvent
Your own voice

Or said another way:

951bc089-a206-4a83-aec7-f82a67dcb1dc

Where I see people get stuck (yours truly included!) is somewhere between copying and reinventing.

It sounds like should. It looks like rules. And it feels like pressure. 

Pressure from rules and shoulds will lead you to shut down, shrink, feel tired, helpless, and very, very small.

You'll freeze and act like a straight-up weirdo because you're hyper-focused on yourself and how you're doing it wrong. And all of this leads to distracting yourself and hiding in checking email and “being productive” in every other area other than the thing you're procrastinating on.

When this becomes too much you give in and tell yourself, “I'll just do it tomorrow.”

Trying to stay safe has you creating a nice, little emotional prison for yourself.
HARDLY the safety and certainty you were after.

The way out is to allow yourself to be bad.

To do it YOUR way.
To feel scared.
To let people not like you or what you created.
To feel like you're stepping into the wild unknown.
To do it wrong.
& ultimately, to fail.

WITHOUT JUDGING, CRITICIZING, OR SHAMING YOURSELF.

In other words, you have to create internal safety for you to do it your way.

External safety = prison

Internal safety = freedom

The more you do this, the easier it gets.

On the other side of this work is true confidence because you like your own ideas and you trust yourself - no matter the outcome. And when you have true confidence, like your own ideas, and trust yourself - no matter the outcome - you procrastinate a WHOLE lot less.

It'll be so much easier for you to get into action, quickly. You'll show up boldly. And you feel like you know what you're doing - even when you've never done it before. Because you know the process of creating safety in uncertainty.

You can plug in any new task, situation or project into that equation. That's when life and work get fun.

Happy safety-creating my friends,

Leave a Reply

Prev Post

What should I plan?

Next Post

How to stop making the same mistakes: evaluate & adjust

%d bloggers like this: