Living in Indecision

grettascholtenJuly 27, 2020

What decisions are you putting off right now?

Living in indecision is exhausting. Whether you're aware of it or not - it's draining your battery.

Why? Indecision is running around fast in the background, just below the surface of your awareness. The more brain energy you're using, the more fatigued you feel.

It's kind of like leaving the door open on a hot summer day. Your air conditioner is still running so it may not feel any different in your house, but your air conditioner is having to work a lot harder to make up for the cold air escaping and the hot air coming inside. Eventually it's going to crash because it won't be able to shut off because it can't ever get to equilibrium. It's constantly trying to make up for the extra heat. The air conditioner is like your brain. Crashing in real life looks like feeling really down, or exhausted, or weak.

Signs you may be in indecision:

  • You're really tired.
  • You feel heavy.
  • You have a hard time focusing.
  • There's a lot of mental chatter but you're not even sure what's being said up there because it's fast and muddled.
  • You're spending a lot of time buffering, or using external things like social media or food instead of feeling your feelings.
  • You have an underlying feeling of dread or resistance.
  • There is a decision that you're putting off or that you're telling yourself you'll make later when you have more information, but it's not on your calendar and you're not actively seeking information.

Anytime you're putting off a decision or you haven't acted on a decision you've made: you're in indecision.

Some reasons why we avoid decisions are:

  • We're scared. Especially if we identify as someone who takes their time evaluating all of their options, someone who does a lot of research before deciding, or someone who just doesn't make a lot of decisions. You do this because you give a lot of weight to the decision. Most decisions are fixable. The more of them you make, the less big and consequential they seem.
  • We don't want to make the wrong choice. There's no such thing as a wrong or a right choice - there's what we decide and what we make it mean. We can make our choices mean anything we want.
  • We don't want to miss out on another option. We're always prioritizing. Decide what's most important if it's truly and either/or choice. Is there a way you can do both? Do you want to do both?

Ultimately, this all boils down to not having your own back. Decide. And then back yourself up on the decision. When doubt creeps in (it will), don't make it mean anything. Because it doesn't. Anytime you do something new, doubt will be there. Just count on it. It doesn't mean anything has gone wrong.

Decide. And then make sure it was the best decision ever. You've always been the only person who can make that determination anyway. Why not decide on purpose and ahead of time that it was the best decision? If you do, you'll make sure it was the best decision instead of giving away your power and blaming someone or something else for your results. Your results are always your responsibility.

If you want help with this process or want to learn more about managing your mind, schedule a free consultation!

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