Who or what are you blaming for not having what you want in life?

Why don't you make more money when you want to make more money? Why are you in a career you hate? Why are you spending time with people you don't enjoy? Why are you working more hours than you want? Why do you think you're not present with your husband or kids or friends when you want to be?

What did you list as your reasons? Time? Money? Kids? Spouse? The economy? If you blamed anything outside of yourself: you're wrong. The reason why you don't have those things is only because of you. If you feel triggered by that: great! You're doing it right! Stick with me, it gets better. The second part: if you did blame yourself, congratulations! You now know the thought that's leading the result you DON'T want. These are often called limiting beliefs. They feel true to us, but they aren't. They're stories we tell ourselves that keep us stuck right where we are and not moving forward. Dismantling these are the key to getting what you want most out of life. When you're able to dissolve those old beliefs and believe a new thought, you'll great a different result. More on that tomorrow. Let's get back to responsibility.

  1. List everything you want in life.
  2. For each item, ask yourself: Why don't I have it yet?
  3. Notice where you're blaming someone else, time or money for a result you don't want OR where you're believing a negative story about yourself. Why are you choosing to believe it? Is it getting you the result you want? All thoughts and beliefs are optional. Do you want to learn how to choose again so you can get a different result?
  4. Ask yourself with curiosity, non-judgement and compassion: How is this (result that I don't want) my fault? What actions did I take or fail to take? What am I believing about my capability to create this result? Again. I emphasize with compassion.When we turn the lights on and see what we're thinking and how we're responsible for what we've created, it's tempting to blame and shame ourselves. Please don't do that. It doesn't make it go away, you'll still all feel all of the negative feelings created by those thoughts and you'll keep creating the result you DON'T want. In order to change we have to keep the lights on long enough to see what's there. We then can decide on purpose what to keep and what to toss.

    Now for the good news: since YOU created the result that you don't want, you can also create the result that you DO want! How? Responsibility. Responsibility is power. Step into it and see.

    If you're ready to start creating the results you want, let's talk. Click How to Work With Me and send me a message or if there's a time in my scheduler that works well for you - grab it!

Leave a Reply